Close to 15 years ago, my mom married someone who she thought was an ideal man at the time. He had a doctorate in technology and was an interesting intellectual with the views of a capable provider. After they had established an incredibly successful business, what started as a penchant for a few weekend drinks to celebrate success and luxury, eventually turned into a 10 litre bucket of vodka a week.

In my opinion, the problem was that the IQ by far outweighed his EQ, and once the business was established he was bored. Being a particularly difficult person who hadn’t dealt with the demons of his past, he couldn’t find joy in others’ company - nor could he find any fulfilling activity in his life. As most men tend to, he was not interested in dealing with his demons and instead tried to drink them away.

Within a few more years the alcoholism turned into fully blown verbal and physical abuse. His refusal to address the core of his problems led him to being a divorced alcoholic with almost every possible alcoholism-related disease known to man.

What is the point?

The point is that one can choose to run their whole lives and lose everything that is dear to them or they can choose to recover. Recently, my mom said a wise thing when we were chatting about how good our lives are without her ex: “Your life is like a glass and it has limited space as to what you can fill it with. If you choose to fill it with rubbish like booze and drugs, you will miss out on the rest of the vital things you need. His vodka pushed out everything he needed to be happy.”