I can't believe this is happening to me: coming to grips with being addicted

Who would have thought that you would land up here? Probably not you! We know that as a youngster when you contemplated what you wanted to be "when you grew up", drug addict, alcoholic, sex addict, over eater, under eater, self-mutilator or compulsive gambler probably wasn't in your 20-year plan! It may be difficult for you to accept that this has happened to you – that you have an addiction that is ruling your life. What we hope you can hear right now is that YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Addiction affects millions of people irrespective of age, race, gender, socio-economic status, profession, intelligence, religion or sexual orientation.

We also know that whilst your behaviour and / using may have once been fun, if you are here reading this, it certainly isn't anymore. Perhaps your beliefs that you can "stop whenever you want to" and that you "have it under control" have started to dismantle. Perhaps you have reached a point where it is undeniable that you have a problem. And while your addiction may have started off bringing you pleasure, it has landed up (and taken you) to a whole other place - a place that is no longer fun. A place that is dark and scary. A place you may not know how to get out of.

How do I know if I have an addiction?

It's usually hard for people to recognize they have a problem, which is why friends or family often step in. People with good intentions may have tried to pass on information to you about your behaviour or you may have some preconceived ideas about what behaviour actually constitutes an addiction. This information about addiction may sometimes be inaccurate and as long as you can stop for a while you may become convinced that you don't have a problem.

Below are some issues to contemplate that may help you come to a decision about whether your drug use/behaviour may be considered problematic.

First things first – who is an addict?

The first thing to come to terms with is that addiction is NOT defined only on how much you use/engage in a behaviour or how often you do. But rather WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DO. An alcoholic is not always someone who has a drink first thing in the morning nor is it always someone who can't make it through the day without it. A drug addict isn't always lying in the gutters of Hillbrow with a needle in his arm and a sex addict is not someone who seeks out sex all the time.

How do I know if my loved one has an addiction?

For some friends and families the addiction is "out in the open" and everyone is aware that it is happening, but for others of you there may be the start of a suspicion and an inkling that something is not right with the person you love.

For these of you, this is never an easy straightforward question to answer. It may start with thinking “Something's up! I'm not sure what's happening but something in my gut tells me my loved one is not telling me the truth”.

It may start with stories that seem too far fetched to be true or it may become too unlikely that bad things keep happening to them and everyone else is to blame.

Its likely that the person you know and love has changed so much that they are not the person you know and care for. While there may be a number of reasons that could account for a change in someone's behaviour, it could be reason enough to think IS IT AN ADDICTION?

What can be an addiction? What should I look out for?

Remember: whilst drugs and alcohol may be the most common things that come to mind when speaking of addiction, addiction is like an octopus, it is able to change forms and take on many different manners.

While the signs and symptoms for specific addictions may vary, here are some of the more common ones across the board.

recovery is not easy and a whole new life is unfolding before you. New people, new experiences and a challenging journey of trying and doing everything differently.

Anyone who loves roller coasters will tell you that one element that makes riding them so exciting is that they consist of ups and downs, highs and lows! So too recovery is journey that consists of ups and downs, highs (not literally) and lows. Such is life!

Whether you're on top of the world or feeling a bit wobbly, we want to support you in your process. We trust you are exactly where you are meant to be!

• Things are going well
  
• Things are not going as well as they could be
  

For many people the thought of going into a formal treatment programme can be overwhelming and off putting. Whilst formal treatment is often the most effective manner in which to treat addiction, there are a number of alternatives to this should you feel that you are unable to commit to a treatment programme at this stage. These are outlined below.

If all other efforts have not worked, or if you are ready to join a treatment programme it may be time to seek specialised help. Within the category of treatment options there are several choices. Think about the nature and severity of the problems you are experiencing as you decide which option might be best.

There are various treatment options available for someone seeking help for an addiction. Usually a client will undergo an assessment at either a treatment centre or with an addiction's professional. Once this is done the treatment centre/professional will determine the best client-treatment match.